1. Never trust a man who has a fridge stocked with pesto but no ketchup.
2. Sometimes prayer works when your truck doesn't start. Sometimes a new battery works better.
3. Never take a cart when you go to Costco. Or else your bill will be so high you will have to sign off on your first born. Seriously, who NEEDS a 5 gallon jar of pickles?
4. My grandmother had something called a "dinner ring" and wore it after she had changed into something 'appropriate' for dinner. I have something called "sweatpants" and I wear them while I eat my dinner that comes from the microwave.
5. A hair straightener can become an excellent clothes iron in a pinch. (I like to think MacGuyver would be proud of me)
6. Some things just don't translate. Like explaining how funny a phone conversation I had today with my friend about how I plan on trying out for the Amazing Race with an imaginary partner. Needless to say, it would be me, not Hank, who would be performing all the tasks but I would be yelling at him to "hurry up!", endlessly. See? Not so funny typed, but at the time it was hysterical.
7. There is a man in Texas who thinks Canada is in Utah. This should make me sad but it just makes me giggle.
8. It's impossible for me to listen to "Brown Eyed Girl" without wishing I had brown eyes. And a boyfriend who loved layering his clothes and playing that song on the guitar and singing it to me every morning immediately after he serving me breakfast in bed. Oh, and he has a dog too. And nieces he lets braid his hair. And he's always saying things like "how did I ever manage without you!?". And he has parents who marvel at my brain and hug me everytime they see me (which is usually once a month when the whole gang meets for brunch at the estate). And- okay I need to stop.
9. When you start trying to figure out chords, it's time to take a step back and reconsider your love for the air guitar.
10. March Madness makes me happier than Christmas. (I started a pool!)